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Food for Thought

Drew Nacht

I have been eying that main course
since the small talk and appetizers began.
As usual, my mind clicks into high gear,
running beyond hopes and expectations
into a wall of cynicism and I will say, hostility,
which sounds silly
but I need to prepare myself for the inevitable disappointment.
I can slow my breathing down
by just assuming the food will suck-
then I can fill my head with all the regular lies like
I wasn’t really that hungry
and I would rather watch other people slobber over their food,
than have someone staring at the dribble
escaping from my mouth.
Plus I know if I eat it I will throw it up.
Eventually, I will look too thin again to everyone
except the mirror.
I am not saying I learned to see what I want to see in the mirror
from the mirror,
but I can’t deny that that tight-lipped mirror
doesn’t do me any favors



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