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Song Monster

Richard K. Williams

    We were on our way to a local restaurant in Augusta Maine called Roosters to see our good friends John and his wife Doreen. John is a talented singer and songwriter who was performing that night at the restaurant. He would prefer I to refer to him as “the handsome Englishman” but, there is only so much I can ask a reader to believe.
    John plays a mixture of music ranging from the sixties through current rock songs including original songs. (big Beatles fan from Yeovil England, imagine that.) His gigs are always a good time, especially when the crowd responds to John’s “dad” jokes. He’ll say “I stole this song from Tom Petty” and I’ll call “And that makes you?” “A petty thief” he’ll answer. Or while singing Oaisis’s Wonderwall, to get a reaction from the crowd he will insert silly song lyrics like “And all the goals that Yeovil scored were blinding”. He will also switch songs mid verse mashing them together in a montage. Like, Is she really going out with him, into Scooby Snacks, into American pie, into Doo Wah Diddy and so on. When the people start clapping and singing along the fun level increases significantly. He also had a running gag with his wife Doreen where he would begin playing the song “Sweet Home Alabama” and Doreen would yell “NO” and he would immediately stop playing and switch to another song.
    This evening my wife and I were running a little late, arriving after John had started his first of three, one-hour sets. John has a regular fan base of friends that come to his gigs sometimes referred to as the johntourage. We were surprised to see four people we did not recognize sitting at a table with Doreen. Since there were no available chairs at Doreen’s table, we waved to John and Doreen, and we took seats at a table nearby. When the table next to Doreen’s emptied my wife and I moved over to it and pushed it against the one where Doreen was seated. She introduced us to the two couples seated with her. They were John’s two brothers Ray and Steve and their wives Teri and Pam. They had arrived unannounced for a visit to see John. It was an amazing occurrence considering that Ray and Teri live in western Canada, and Steve and Pam live in England. They had gotten together and devised this plan to come to America to surprise their brother and sister-in-law. We spent the rest of the evening enjoying their company and getting to know them better. Steve and Ray are as funny and entertaining as their brother John minus the guitar. The three brothers shared insults (in good humor of course) as well as hilarious stories about each other growing up.
    John was nearly through his third set when he started to play “Sweet Home Alabama” and of course Doreen yelled “NO” and John stopped playing. But, in the first booth close to where John was set up, a young girl of about nine or ten was having dinner with her father. When John stopped playing Sweet Home she jumped up and in the most pleading voice you ever heard began begging. “Oh please, please play that song! It’s my most favorite song in the whole world! Please, please play it for me, please!” I think she even added that it was her birthday. John, visibly flustered, began to stammer out an explanation that it was a joke between him and his wife and ... At that moment John’s brother Steve stood up and using his English accent to its fullest, shouted “PLAY THE SONG FOR THE LITTLE GIRL YOU MONSTER!” So, John played the song while the little girl happily bounced in her seat clapping along.
    The rest of us laughed like hell.

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