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Market Place

Richard K. Williams

    We all have characters in our lives. Personalities that stand out in our memories by the impact or influence they have had on us. In my younger adult days, in the semi urban town I was living in, in New Jersey there was a cast of characters. One in particular meets this criteria, a friend of a friend called Uncle Vito. Uncle Vito owned a small corner market that was a local gathering place for friends and people in the neighborhood. The market was a family affair, Vito’s brother Joe (known as Uncle Joe of course) and Vito’s son Steve worked there along with two other fellows Carmine and Stan.
    Whether it was a stop in for morning coffee before work, a quick drop in just to say hello, or to purchase some of the prime meats that he sold there, you never knew who would be hanging around or what the topic of discussion would be. Much of the banter that occurred there was inappropriate for the average customer and by todays standards would be considered by many as offensive. Vito was loud and gregarious; he didn’t mince words or hide his opinions. The others could keep up with him but he was definitely the leader of the gang.
     Jokes such as: Did you hear about the kid who asked his father for five dollars for a guinea pig? His dad said take ten kid get yourself a nice Irish girl! Any topic was fair game whether it be politics, people in the neighborhood, or each other. Profanity was a natural portion of any conversation but would cease instantly should a customer come in. A slip by anyone during a customer’s visit was loudly reprimanded by Uncle Vito. I recall a time I was in the store purchasing one of the precut meat packages the store offered. As I was heading out, I unconsciously said, “Bye Joe.“ To Vito’s brother. Uncle Vito yelled from across the store “It’s UNCLE Joe jerkoff!“ I apologized and said, “I’m sorry you’re right, goodbye UNCLE Joe jerkoff!“ The shock and surprised look on Vito’s face was priceless. Of course the whole place erupted in laughter. The guys would also tease and poke fun at vendors they were close to. The young man who delivered the fresh bread early every morning once let it slip that he was a religious person so, Uncle Vito and the boys put centerfold pictures all over the bread rack just to watch the kids reaction when he showed up to deliver the bread. He took it pretty well saying “Oh man, Vito, I don’t need to be seeing this stuff so early in the morning!“ As he tore the pictures down and stacked the bread in the rack. He handed the wadded up porn to Vito and said, “You need these more than I do!“ Vito yelled back, “So now you’re a wise ass? Get the fuck outta my store and don’t come back...until tomorrow with more bread!“ “Yeah, yeah, yeah, tomorrow, see ya.“ The bread guy said walking out the door waving his arm over his receding back.
    Don’t get me wrong, Uncle Vito was a great guy; he was constantly helping people out in the neighborhood. He offered credit to those who ran short at the end of the month. He supported local charities. If you were a close friend he was generous to a fault never asking for anything in return. I remember once when I picked up my order of meats, I notice there were too many steaks in the package. I took the extras back and he was so grateful from then on I got a discount on everything I bought. We were social friends as well, getting together at parties and other social gatherings. Our families knew each other. I worked with Vito’s other son Rick as well.
    The memory that stands out in my mind that created the Uncle Vito legend went like this.
    I took my three-year-old son into the market one Saturday morning to pick up our weekly order. As we were standing at the counter Uncle Vito leans over the countertop and loudly asks my son, “Keith do you want a lollipop?“ He was holding the prize in his hand. My son looked at the lollipop and Uncle Vito and said, “Yes please.“ Uncle Vito held the lollipop out in front of Keith’s face and said, “Then call you father a jerkoff!“ My son was stunned for a second his head turning quickly between me, the lollipop, and Uncle Vito. He looked at Vito and said, “Give me the lollipop first and I will.“ Uncle Vito replied, “You promise?“ My son vigorously nodded his head. Uncle Vito gave Keith the lollipop. Keith then quickly tore the wrapper off and stuck the lollipop in his mouth and around it said, “I’m not doing that.“ The look of amazement on Vito’s face was beyond gold! Uncle Vito was speechless, for the first time since I knew him utterly speechless. At that moment I realized that my son at three years old had out maneuvered a grown man. Which meant to me he was one smart kid and could take care of himself. Thirty five years later that truth still stands, character builds character.

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