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This writing was accepted for publication in the 108 page perfect-bound ISSN# / ISBN# issue/book “Wintering Over” Down in the Dirt v214 (12/23) Order the paperback book:

Order this writing that appears in the one-of-a-kind anthology Instant Karma the Down in the Dirt September-December 2023 issues collection book		get the 422 page September-December 2023 Down in the Dirt 6" x 9" ISBN# perfect-bound paperback book:

Baking As Therapy

Suzanne O’Connell

The world seems about to give up,
so I decide to bake bread.
I hover over the mound of dough
on the floured board,
pushing regret away,
folding memory back on itself,
pulling hope toward me.
I watch it rise in the bowl until it glistens,
a body anointed with oil—
either flesh rising from the bath
or a body prepared for burial.
Isn’t it always the simple things?
Three ingredients create a miracle—
something arrives bigger than itself,
rich with the history of primitive man
baking on open fires.

My mother only baked once—
one horrible try at Christmas cookies.
I forget what went wrong,
I only remember her tears
and declaration that
she’d never do this again.
There was no fun in it.
All the decorations we didn’t use—
the silver balls, green and red sprinkles,
and white frosting
remained in their packages.
The other three ingredients,
my mother, my sister, and me,
burned and cracked like the cookies.

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