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cc&d v201

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Ink in my Blood (poetry edition)
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Weathered

The Coffee House

Alex Jimenez

I
We meet every day at the Coffee House
I forget how it all started
I order black coffee no sugar
You drink a fancy chocolate something
At first we just chat shyly
You with your school girl looks
Me, reminding you of a professor
Later you tell me you slept with him
Sophomore or maybe Junior year
Makes me hopeful somehow

II
We meet before and after work
Sometimes at lunch
Depends on my case work
Or if your boss has you running errands
Flirting intensifies each day
Our arms next to each other
In the summer time with short sleeves
By winter time we are holding hands

III
One of the partners sees us
Asks me if my wife knows about you
I look at her, smile and walk away
She is a gossip so everyone will know
Yet, it matters little to me

IV
You even met my wife once
On a Saturday when I stopped by
To get a cup and she was with me
To my surprise you were there
At our table, chocolate in hand
I brought her over and told her
You were a paralegal at the firm
She shook your hand firmly
You smiled that beautiful smile
Winked at me and tilted your head
The way you do to show a better angle
You swept your hair out of your face
She smiled back and lingered
I could tell she liked you
She even told me as much later
She is a bigger flirt than me

V
We begin to talk boldly
About meeting somewhere else
About traveling together

VI
Your boyfriend, I meet as well
He is a handsome young man
Remind me, bike messenger?
We could not be more different
I am jealous of his carefree ways
The tattoos on his arms
The swagger in his step
I am sure that he could not imagine
That I was once like him
Or at least I pretend I was
Always busy with school
Wishing I could be like those boys
I lost that desire in law school

VII
And now as a partner
My life is scripted
Except for the Coffee House
Where I find you eager to talk
You want to tell me about that movie
Or that song you heard on the way
About your best friend Becca

VIII
Sometimes I don’t listen
All I see is your smile
The angle of your face
The sweet voice that accompanies me

IX
It is Spring now and we have plans
You are coming with me on a business trip
Your boyfriend has no idea
My wife might know but does not care
She is busy with her mixed doubles partner

X
We sit side by side during our flight
We hold hands like lovers
We even kiss for the first time
We arrive in San Francisco in rapture
As soon as we get to the hotel
We rip our clothes off and make love
Or have sex, we have different stories
We spend all of our time there together
Too afraid that we may never have this again
We fly back to Virginia still acting like lovers

XI
The next day I wait for you at the Coffee House
You do not arrive and I worry
In a hurry I go to your boss and ask
He says you called in sick
I resist the urge for a while
But call you after an hour
Lars answers the phone
I ask him about you and how you are
His voice trembles
He tells me you are gone
I am confused and ask him again
He tells me all your things are gone
I promise to call him back
I call your cell phone
And there is no answer

XII
For days all I think about is you
I call Lars again and he is confused
We meet at the Coffee House
He tells me that you came home and cried
Packed all of your stuff while he slept
And left him a note that said
“Lars, I loved you!”
I want to confess to him
He deserves some sort of explanation
We say goodbye and he hugs me
I know your pain, I tell him
He calls me brother
And says that we are the same
I watch him leave the Coffee House
My eyes water as he gets on his bike

XIII
Three months later I get a postcard
It is an apology from you
You went to be with your professor
And now live in Sacramento

XIV
I seek out Lars at the Coffee House
Almost every time I go there
I see him often and we talk
But never at the tables
I now drink some chocolate drink
I am getting a tattoo next week
We are talking about doing bike races together
But we never talk about you



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