The Pen and the Pendulum
Eric Obame
One day I will not wake up
One night my lids will close
And they will stay that way until time turns them into dust
Will I be remembered by anyone other than my loved ones?
Or is that enough?
Does it suffice to be just a name on the family tree?
Although thirteen hours separate us, I see the worry in my father’s eyes
I hear the doubt in his voice, days after I hang up the phone
As I struggle to reach where I want to be—who I want to be
He calls and tries to steer me toward calmer waters
He calls to tell me to walk a road more traveled
With less potholes and clearer signs
He loves me
But this is my journey
It is my boat
These are my feet
The tall tree of fortune
Wide like all the wood of the forests merged into one
Not wide enough for all the men and women on the ground to climb
What if I reached those small branches?
The ones too lofty for most men and women to grasp
The ones way above worry
The ones where you can dream in ease beneath the moon
And watch the sunrise with a smile
For you know that when the hungry creditors come
They will not be targeting you
The ones with the juiciest fruits
With the ample space for comfort
Dad, Mom, my kid sister, my little brother and I
We are already somewhere in the middle of the tree
Maybe a little past
I see now that my dad worked his fingers to the bone
To reach this level
To give my younger siblings and I a head start
He is still trying to reach the top
He is a great man
There I go
Alone
Climbing
Putting words on blank pages
A grip here
Another there
It is a slow and hard climb
Made even more difficult by all this human congestion
This people traffic in the way
Most men and women on the tree never move an inch
They are just there
Other climbers run out of fuel or break down
Or tired of the stop and go
They simply exit and find containment on whatever level they are on
I wish I could see the top
I cannot know how high I will get
I do not know where the path I am on will take me
And how many obstacles are ahead
I do not want to disappoint my dad
But putting words on blank pages is what I am
And it is what I am going to do to try to reach the top of this tree
So that we—he, mom, my sister, brother and I—can live without worry
