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“Shot out of a Cannon”
cc&d (v248) (the January / February 2014 Issue)



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 Shot out of a Cannon

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Jesoo, King of the Jews

Fritz Hamilton

    Jesoo, King of the Jews, hears the news that Syria is about to explode & be another Iraq, not that Iraq has stopped being Iraq/ after our surge to solve all problems there’s been more sectarian violence than ever with Sunnis killing Shihas & Shihas killing Sunnis, Assad of Syria has just immolated hundreds of his own people in an act unparallelled since Hitler to get the upper hand on Syria’s rebels. The American people don’t want another military fiasco like we’ve just experienced in Iraq & Afghanistan. Let the Syrians get out of their own drec, & Ragmop is curled in front of the tv watching a football game as I drink my chocolate milk contemplating the tire around my middle.
    “Ragmop, the world is going to Hell.”
    “The world’s been in Hell, Fred, since its inception.”
    “But it’s worse.”
    “U’d rather have a flood with Noah shoving animals in an ark?”
    “Yes.”
    “To each his own, Fred. The Bears are losing to Detroit, & all U care about is another carnage in the East & a flood.”
    “& the fact that U’ve eaten most of the pizza, Ragmop.”
    “Well, I need it more, Fred, even if U bought it. Thanks for the anchovies. Has Cutler thrown another interception while I was reaching for another piece?”
    “That’s all the piece we’re gonna get, Ragmop.”
    Jesoo wearily rises from against the wailing wall & climbs back onto the cross, cause who gives a shit?

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