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Hey, Jesoo, U remember when

Fritz Hamilton

    “Hey, Jesoo, U remember when those three wiseguys visited U in the manger when U had no crib for a bed, & they had all those gifts for U while I was howling in the hay with nothing?”
    “Of course, Judas, U were fucked & carried a resentment all the way to the moment U hanged yrself.”
    “Can U blame me?”
    “U hanged yrself, I didn’t do it.”
    “Well, U might have. U’re the one who caused it.”
    “U caused it yrself, asswipe. U felt bad about ratting on me. If U hadn’t squealed, U wouldn’t have felt guilty & offed yrself”
    “Guilt’s a rotten thing, man. It never got anyone anything.”
    “U should’ve been a good psychpath. U wouldn’t have felt a thing. You would have lived. Then maybe we’d have Judasanity instead of Christianity.”
    “So what’s in a name? We still would have had our religious wars. We still would have obliterated Hiroshima & Nagasaki & Dresden. We’d have Iraq & Afghanistan & drones & all the rest of the shit. The more we know, the better we kill one another.”
    “I wonder if Judasanity would have been as bad as Christianity.”
    “It’s hard to believe Judas would have been that bad.”
    They leap into Jesoo’s old cave just when a drone hits near them & they’re damn near killed!

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