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This writing was accepted for publication in the 96 page perfect-bound ISSN# / ISBN# issue/book... “a Rural Story” Down in the Dirt (v126) (the Nov./Dec. 2014 Issue) You can also order this 6"x9" issue as a paperback book:

Order this writing in the book What Must be Done (a Down in the Dirt July - Dec. 2014 collection book)		get the 372 page July - Dec. 2014 Down in the Dirt magazine issue collection 6" x 9" ISBN# paperback book:

How To Know You Are Really Done is When

Ralph Monday

The moon turns into limburger cheese and
you don’t notice.
You find yourself at piano bars wishing Billy
Holiday was crooning only to you.
The girl you picked up at the piano bar takes
off her shirt and it looks like its been photoshopped.
After the piano bar your wife told you that she wanted
a divorce and you said you wanted crème brulee.
The office girl hears you crying in the bathroom
and thinks its because Valentines is coming up.
You begin looking for your manhood in a
brown paper bag.
You think you should carry your manhood around
in a brown paper bag, like trickster does in a box.
You know you are having an identity crisis because
you find yourself humming Barry Manilow tunes.
The girl who heard you humming the songs
thinks you have a disease.
At 50 you look through your high school yearbook
and become nostalgic for the girl who hated your guts.
You start to prefer milk over wine and think that
women only want to be tamed.
The major interest that you have any more is
your car.
After the third marriage you become a very
bad philosopher.

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