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KOSHER DIVERSION AND Mrs. ALLEN
Richard Fein
Lie with your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother. But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so whenever he lay with his brother's wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from producing offspring for his brother. What he did was wicked in the LORD's sight. . .”
GENESIS 38:8-10
But the girls sitting next to us were as unreachable
as Mrs. Allen was standing in front of us,
teaching about all the angles, right, acute, and obtuse.
Mrs. Allen mumbled something about Pythagoras and triangles,
while all the female forms around us softened into curves.
I knew the ancient tale and misconstrued taboo.
Onan was wicked for his disobedience, for the selfish aborting of his seed
and not for just rubbing God the wrong way.
As for me, delicious Debra sat just to my left
and yet she might as well have been on the other side of the world.
The room was hot and reeked of sweat. The sun lit our acned faces.
And the girls that shared our space,
they could get up at the bell no matter how horny
with no telltale protuberances.
My hands needed to perform a kosher diversion.
I asked Mrs Allen for the pass, “Please, I have to go.”
“No,” pay attention was her decree.
And unlike Onan I obeyed.
Then in a bulging blouse and tight skirt
she droned on about our next lesson-circles and conic sections.
She traced them on the board with her pointer,
the rubber tip going round and round.