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This writing was accepted for publication in the 108 page perfect-bound ISSN# / ISBN# issue/book... “On the Rocks” Down in the Dirt, v147 (the July 2017 Issue) You can also order this 6"x9" issue as a paperback book:

Order this writing in the issue book Random Thoughts the Down in the Dirt July-Dec. 2016 collection book		get the 418 page May-August 2017 Down in the Dirt issue anthology 6" x 9" ISBN# paperback book:

Dumbass World

E. Martin Pedersen

On our planet stupidity is revered
We celebrate it as a form of entertainment and culture
We’re offended by suggestions of diminishing returns
What, we’re not number one?
Oh yes we fucking are!!!

Would you vote for a thieving lying racist?
No.
X is one, would you vote for him?
Yes.
Why?
Because I like him, he’s qualified.

Would you buy and use a household product proved to be toxic?
Yes.
Why?
Because I want to. It’s a free country
(Two thumbs up and a grin)

I wonder what will happen if I drive my car into a brick wall
If I get laid by the HIV-positive cutie
(he/she’s so sexy)
Ya think I can drink an entire bottle of Jack Daniels in one gulp
Like John Belushi in Animal House?
He’s so cool; I love him.
Loved him.

So are you saying I have to pay for sending wetbacks back to Wetbackland?
Yes.
I won’t pay, I won’t; I want budget cuts, tax cuts, my due, my fair share, buddy
The government only exists to steal my money, my hard-earned cash
Gotta cheat the cheaters before they cheat me
And all illegal aliens gotta go
Or toss ‘em in jail and torture ‘em
That’ll teach ‘em who we are.

I got it
Let’s have a blind transgender midget toss to raise money for charity
I don’t know any blind transgender midgets.
O.K., we’ll use newborn children.
Isn’t that dangerous?
That’s why people will pay to see it. It’s for charity!
We’ll get ‘em drunk first.
Who? The children?

Dumbass country in a dumbass world, Dumbass
We’re stoned on self-mutilation
Let’s start a war just to see what happens
Like killing, you mean?
Man versus food, food versus mass destruction
Jesus versus Bigfoot
That’d be a good fight
Or cut off our noses to look like a cartoon
in an app game I just downloaded
my thumbs hurt though
but they’re gradually bending

Everyone wants to suffer, to fail
To lose control, to drink the poison
Why? Why not? Why? Why not?
The constant experimentation
Exasperation of advanced technology
The dark ages, renaissance, industrial age
The space age and then –
The dumbass age.
Yahoo!

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