brother, and sister, and father of mine
keep us together, ad keep us in line
a lot we depend on, a lot we can do
send love to mother, I’ll be good to you
- Andy Bell, Erasure, ~1988
So I listened to a record I owned
yeas ago,
and I was telling my husband
that this one song
always made me cry
I didn’t tell him
it was because
I alwways felt out of place
in my family
I didn’t tell him
it was because
I was always the odd one out
that always felt out of place
I didn’t bother telling him that
because who wants to hear those details anyway
right?
well, not like this matters
this is normal for us,
but he was sleeping
when I was listening to music
when I told him
(while he was awake)
that song always made me cry
so much for piquing someone’s interest
when my mother is dying
so I listened to these words
and I can’t remember why they made me cry
other than they might have reminded me
of how much I hated everything
and had no one to turn to
and still don’t
but I heard that song tonight
and I had to play it again
while he was still sleeping
because it took on a new meaning today
because i have to send love to mother
who is so far away
(I guess that’s how she always has been)
but I’ll be good to you
I’m always the last one out in this family
I’m the forgotten one
I don’t want to be too much of a burdem
but I’ll be there
when you die
