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This writing was accepted for publication in the 84 page perfect-bound issue of cc&d (v239) (the December 2012 Issue) You can also order this 5.5" x 8.5" issue as an ISSN# paperback book:

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enjoy this writing from Janet Kuypers in the cc&d free 2015 PDF file chapbook: India Stories of India poems and never-before performed poems live 3/14/15 at Chicago’s Art Colony Click the title or the cover to download the free PDF file chapbook.

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Order this poem in the 2023 poetry book Testament Janet Kuypers poetry book from CyberWit.net press		This book includes poetry in 4 sections: part 1 (over half the book) is all women’s-rights post-Roe v. Wade poetry post-Dobbs v. Jackson, part 2 is life and death poetry, losing loved ones and suicide, part 3 is poetry reflective of the first book of the Old Shattering the Glass Ceiling, and part 4 is a few closing poems reflective of the last book of the New Testament, that ties into section 1 & women’s rights. order the ISBN# perfect-bonud 5½" x 8½" paperback book from CyberWit.net!

Us Creative Types

Janet Kuypers
5/17/12

I’m angry with you.

I know us creative types
are self-absorbed,

but only if you’re so destitute
that even shelters
or food banks can’t help
should you ever think about it.

I mean, I know
we’re really all so selfish,
and selfishness is a virtue,
but I swear to god,
this is the wrong kind
of selfishness.

If you think this will
make you happy,
this lack of existence,
think of how much
pain you’ve caused
by this one selfish act.

Is that how you
want to be remembered?
I know us creative types
are so self-absorbed,
so wouldn’t you rather
be remembered for your talents,
and not have you
cut-short creativity
be so overshadowed
by the pain you’ve caused?

###

Because screw you,
I know pain,
I’ve been where you’ve been,
I think I’ve been closer than you,
I think I’ve had more reason than you...
I don’t know how long
I was no that edge, and
I struggle to this day
with the knowledge that
I should have just done it
and gotten it over with.

Trust me, I know.

But all us creative types
have these demons haunting us,
and it’s supposed to be
our creativity
that gets us through it all.

So yeah, I’m angry with you.

Because you said
you’re a creative type,
so you should have
been strong enough.

Test your brain and your soul
by testing your creativity more.
I mean, Kerouac may have
tested himself
by bathing in bathtubs of liquor,
people have tested themselves
with anything from drug overdosing
to auto-erotic asphyxiation.
And yeah, those creative
types were selfish,
but they aren’t
as selfish as you.

And I’m angry,
because you took
the easy way out.

And I’m angry,
because you caused
so much pain
in this world
with this one selfish act.

And I’m angry,
because now,
what you’ve done,
the pain you’ve caused,
that’s the only way
I am forced
to think of you now.

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