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one twenty fifteen
destruction instructions:
on destroying a relationship

Janet Kuypers
2/12/15

I know you came to me
for assistance, and I know
all I’m telling you are don’ts,
but if you really want to get rid of them,
follow these simple steps
to destroy a relationship.

Don’t pay them any attention.
I mean, when they ask you
a direct question,
sure, you have to
answer them — eventually,
but just start
going about your life
like they weren’t there.
Forget you have plans together.
Make plans with your friends.
I mean, if the two of you
aren’t meant for each other,
they’re not going to want
to hang out with your
friends anyway, right?
(By the way, that could be
your rationale, if they ask
why you didn’t invite them.)

Don’t give them any space at your place.
Because you don’t want them
to feel like they have
any permanence in your life...
Oh God, you’ve done that already,
haven’t you?
They have their crap at your place?
Or let me guess, they’re trying
to redecorate? (Oh, that’s worse...)
Is the stuff there something of theirs
that can be destroyed —
on “accident”? ‘Cause really,
if you want to end a relationship,
you have to cut any and all strings.
I mean it.

Oh, I was going to suggest
you should look like
you have violent tendencies,
maybe clean your guns more,
but then I realized
that acting crazy
might backfire on you,
they could call the cops or something,
and you don’t want to deal
with that load of mess.
So, don’t go acting crazy,
to drive them away...
As tempting as that sounds.

When something goes wrong,
goes violently wrong,
don’t tell your partner
that you don’t want this to end.
Don’t say that you
don’t want this to be good bye.
Because then you’re giving them
mixed signals, you’re giving them
a glimmer of hope
that things might work out after all...
Because really, the whole point for you
is that you want this relationship
to NOT to work out, right?

Don’t say you don’t want to throw away
your relationship (even if you do),
please, don’t let them think
you’re vested in this any more.

And another thing,
when something goes wrong,
goes violently wrong,
don’t tell them you’re sorry.
God no, that’s the worst thing to say.
Don’t open the window for them
to think you might be at fault...
I don’t give a shit
if it’s your fault or not,
but the last thing you do
is tell them you’re sorry. For anything.

I know they might cling,
I know they might get desperate,
but you said you wanted to be free.
I’m only here to help.

You might not like it,
this might seem
counter-intuitive sometimes,
but they key is
to not think
about what you’re doing.

Yeah, it might hurt,
but that’s the point,
isn’t it?

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