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enjoy this Kyle Hemmings writing in the free April 2013 PDF file chapbook I Was Charles Bronson’s Secret Hostage				You can also order this as a 2013 6" x 9" perfect-bound paperback ISBN# book! Click on the cover spread for the book I Was Charles Bronson’s Secret Hostage

Clint Eastwood and Guess Who’s Not There

Kyle Hemmings

I had him laughing so hard that he promised to lick
my mahogany legs clean if I told him another joke about a
Democratic mayor who lost his head and hallucinated talking
chairs. Truth is I can’t talk at all. I’m just an empty chair. It’s Clint
who puts words on my seat. Sometimes Clint thinks I’m an angry
chair. Like the time he kept asking me why he didn’t get the lead
role in Total Recall. Then he says, DON’T TELL ME YOU
DON’T REMEMBER. No, he said, looking down at me, that’s
my line.

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