enjoy this Brian Looney writing
in the Scars Publications free 2011 PDF file chapbook: Punk Show
(click on the front cover image or the
title text to download the free PDF file)
Alone in the Group
Brian Looney
The opening band exits; the next one enters. I stand outside while they set up their instruments, smoking in the group. The tobacco’s low burn hypnotizes me as the coal consumes itself. A buzz is in my brain, electrifying and uplifting.
I am a small part of them, standing on the fringes, consumed with thought. I stare out up the street. I take in the lights, the signs, the pedestrians. Vehicles glide past, and the inhabitants stare out with charcoal eyes. I relish this jagged center, this aloof inclusion. It jumpstarts sensation.
I came alone, and I stand alone. I stood alone on the outside; I stand alone in the group. I am alone without the music, when it takes its brief siesta. I’m most alone when the silence abounds, and my ears whisper like seashells after a great storm. It’s a terminal emotion, but it retracts when the music resurrects.
Just a few minutes more of this awkward inclusion, glancing sidelong at the people, wondering what’s baking in their brains. The smells reach me, but I shut them out. They can keep their cookies and cream.
