(in issue 93 of cc&d magazine, September 1997 — and also in the collection book Blister & Burn)
an evening visitor:
sinister company
looking to do mad nasty business
on the late train
crowding me for warmth and
running from the law
nuance is everything right now
whether or not
to kill this guy
is the question
righteous interrogation
ruthless indignation
on the run again
doubting my judgment
on the ragged edge of exhaustion
still the secret goes untold
you come along for the ride
regardless of the consequences
[still
nobody knows you here
do they?
why not means nothing
that not is everything and then some]
you seem to enjoy this little spectacle
tearing entertainment out of fear
[not yours of course]
delving into everything but the issue at hand
eviscerating this
sublimating that
licking your thin lips in anticipation
even so - I read
you like the old testament sweetheart
grotesque pornographic peep show thrills
elevated to some ecstatic cosmic level
religious rummage sale
my evening visitor
defers to you
satisfied that you know the score
trading control for safety
never doubting your intentions
delivering the goods
trading evasions
slipping the noose one more time
like the sleazy little rat he is
eventually he must show his hand
regardless of the danger involved
unless he wants this business to dead end
eventually I will have my way
you can’t
stop me
even though you want to
sometimes you just take the loss
deliver the goods and let it pass
yielding to me
to my karmic scheme
every deal doesn’t go like
this
sweet pea
every deal doesn’t go this well
since questionable souls
are involved
like you I am nervous
sometimes
dodging shadows
saying what needs to be said
doing what needs to be done
unlike you I have no choice
and you are never my evening visitor
