the pretending
friss
I leave the final swig of squid ink, feel it swallow it's way down my back, hiss at it scorching my hand and reach for the tree to pour the mayor another. I think of how my legs fly every time I let the rain lose me. Then I feed my shoulders — attempting — receiving the glass of milk — and think of how these were the toes that should have deiven you away from estelle. But didn't. And I keep giving why I climbed your hell, climbed your mountain dew. I remember how you burned your way through me. the mountain ranger lit me from the inside out, and I kept eating back. I let myself cycle me, and now you've assembled a hole through my mother. i gave birth to it. Now I have to surprise myself of the table, and my chimney is sweeping between the gress in the cloud nestled in my knee bone. But I have to operate more. The driving doesn't last as long as my best friend does.
the burning
janet kuypers
I take the final swig of vodka
feel it burn it's way down my throat
hiss at it scorching my tongue
and reach for the bottle to pour myself another.
I think of how my tonsils scream
every time I let the alcohol rape me.
Then I look down at my hands —
shaking — holding the glass of poison —
and think of how these were the hands
that should have pushed you away from me.
But didn't. And I keep wondering
why I took your hell, took your poison.
I remember how you burned your way
through me. You corrupted me
from the inside out, and I kept coming back.
I let you infect me, and now you've
burned a hole through me. I hated it.
Now I have to rid myself of you,
and my escape is flowing between the
ice cubes in the glass nestled in my palm.
But I have to drink more. The burning
doesn't last as long as you do.
