writing from
Scars Publications

Audio/Video chapbooks cc&d magazine Down in the Dirt magazine books

 

ZERO TOLERANCE

Jim Sullivan

“Down in the Dirt” writing


��Money has been added to the list of banned items on all Lakeside Airline flights. Already prohibited are guns, knives, explosives, lethal nail clippers, and vile-looking corkscrews.
��Individuals attempting to bring on the airplane, paper currency or coins, foreign or domestic, will be not only denied a seat on the aircraft but risk arrest and prosecution of the attempt. This is a new regulation, so all potential passengers and crew members, even those hired at the last minute from temporary employee firms, on Lakeside Airline should heed this warning.
��Along with cash, other financial instruments specifically prohibited on board are checks, money orders, and all credit, debit, discount, and check-cashing authority cards (known collectively on the street as ’plastic’).
��And don’t forget to leave your unused postage stamps, which are becoming quite valuable these days, at home. The same goes for IOUs, UOMEs unredeemed gambling chips, rolls of pennies and the like.
��If a person or persons tries to take funds with him, her, or them, or stows same in checked-in suitcases, carry-on bags, or other travel luggage, the identical prohibitions will prevail. Such rule-breakers and scofflaws, therefore, will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.
��Also banned by Lakeside Airline are letters of credit, cashier’s and treasurer’s checks, stocks and bonds, puts and calls, stock options of any kind, commodity futures contracts, and any and all derivatives known to man, woman, or accountant, which could be hid on one’s person or in one’s possessions.
��In fact, the only cash allowed at the Lakeside Airline Terminal or its loading gate or concourse is the price of a plane ticket that absolutely must be surrendered prior to boarding.
��Why, you may well ask, is Lakeside Airline doing this? To avoid the obvious possible problems for travelers: being pick-pocketed, robbed, burglarized, heisted, stuck-up, broken and entered, lifted from, or any number of other crimes connected, in one way or another, with miscreants relieving you of your assets.
��Such nefarious deeds are to be kept from the airport and off the airplane. If the general public knows, full well, that no one on the Lakeside Airline loading gate or on any of its flights has any kind of money, no criminal will bother passengers or crew. After all, most felons are wise enough to avoid their favorite mono where, and when, there’s nothing to be gained. And with such crime deterred, Lakeside Airline can attract more customers because it can guarantee its passengers high-jackless flights and also crime-free rides to and from all destinations.
��Few commercial air carriers today can make such a complete claim. Other airlines, however, are currently studying Lakeside Airline’s policy of zero tolerance for money.





Scars Publications


Copyright of written pieces remain with the author, who has allowed it to be shown through Scars Publications and Design.Web site © Scars Publications and Design. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted without express permission from the author.




Problems with this page? Then deal with it...