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X-RAY SPECS

I remember a big

Dream of childhood.

I sent for pair

Through an ad in the

Back of a Dell comic book.

I thought when they arrived

I’d be able to see through walls,

See through the dresses of high

School girls, see tits&stuff

Just like ad promised.

Thing was, after what seemed

Like months of waiting they finally

Showed up in a flimsy envelope my mom

Handed me&I tore open they turned out

To be these crummy cardboard frames

With celophane lenses like the cheesy

Glasses I got when I saw 13 Ghosts at

The Mayfair,&when I put them on

They didn’t work.

All grown up now with real glasses

I don’t need X-Ray Specs to see what’s

Under a woman’s dress though I still can’t

See through walls unless they’re

Made of windows...

Ah, the cons foisted on children

Through comic book ads&other

Equally tricky teasers,

Kind of makes growing

Up worthwhile,

Doesn’t it?

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