keep looking for death
Janet Kuypers
07/28/11 and 07/29/11
after knocking on death’s door
i waited to recover
clawed my way free
did everything i could
to gain any of my freedoms back
and now that i’m here
i am waiting again
because now i know
death is just around the corner
waiting for me
so i keep looking for it
i walk down a sidewalk
and imagine a car
careening off the road
behind me
so i can’t escape
my impending doom
i go to a store
and imagine that stranger over there
the one that doesn’t look quite right
and see him pull out a gun
for whatever’s in the register
don’t make any sudden moves
or death may really find you this time
i was stopped at an intersection
when two cars tossed me around
like i was nothing
and if the odds seem so slim
that something like that could ever happen,
i think of how i always seem to beat the odds
and wonder how it may happen again:
speeding down an expressway
the wind may tunnel through
as I am behind and next to a semi
turning my car
so i’m headed right into this big truck
i keep looking for it
and i keep managing to just scrape by
but still,
i keep lookng
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