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Order this writing that appears in the one-of-a-kind anthology The Limits of Imagination the Down in the Dirt January - April 2024 issues collection book		get the 422 page January - April 2024 Down in the Dirt 6" x 9" ISBN# perfect-bound paperback book:

Did You Ever Have One Of Those
Unfuckinbelievable Days?

Clarence Allan Ebert

We didn’t give a fuck back in the day.
Today. We give a fuck about too many things.
We used to shrug and say - So
what’s da big fucking deal?
It’s only money. Only a small rip.
You can sew it. He didn’t mean it.
You must have misunderstood. Just something
lost in the mail. Tomorrow’s another day.
What’s da big fuckin deal?.

These days the world is a streaming/gas
passing upside/down crap/crapola
feedback looping e-service shit/place
where everyone’s stressed/desperate
pursuing acceptance and finger-fucking
the boss who sells Viagra as a side/hustle
& politicians in wing-tip shoes shove/up your ass
so far you taste the leather tongue. We’re telling
ourselves — I suck more than ever and everybody’s
prettier than me and my friends have pockets/full
of Benjamins that make me want/to get more stuff
so I/You/We are really Happy/Happy/You/Me/I!
All this bullshit we got stuffed
in the brain’s dark back corners like/as if
we don’t have to pass through
that scary room in the back/brain
once in a while and look in
the mind’s/mirror at the Master
fuck/you/maker that is your own
dumb/self and mind/numbed
spinning out of control like some
Godamn widget spinner!

Don’t you sometimes want to behead
the first newborn you find and mail
the Lil bugger’s head to Santa Claus
to make that fucking fat/old/white man cry?
You realize SC isn’t real. So Jesus and
a green Martian walk into a bar and order
a motor oil Martini and a plate of testicles.

What’s the punch-line? A fucking fire starts
in the bar. The green Martian tries to extinguish
it with the motor oil. Jesus is burned alive/burned up.
Charred beyond recognition. He never makes it
to Hell to meet/up with Satan before His
resurrection. He doesn’t reunite with His angry-as-Hell
Dad (irony here). So we’re all fucked.

It’s been-a-bad day. Truly a bad day for me.
Fucked-up/Recall/day with my mad mind
sick/stuck on one fucking thing always that
one Godamn thing/giving me days like this.
If only I hadn’t shit/faced forgotten
to pick up my 8-year-old son & angel
from fun/loving school.
He might never have disappeared.

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