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A day at Sam’s Club

Jimmie Perry

    They were right there, how did he expect me not to take one.
    I walked into the Sam’c Club, which was full of people, and immediately smelled fresh bread and cooked (and seasoned) chicken.
    There were so many people in the store that it took me a few seconds to even get inside. Crazy right?
    I took a good look around to see where the smell was coming from and found that there was a booth setup by the clothing items with fresh paninis.
    Before I purchased anything from the store I went to the booth to see if I could snag one.
    I hadn’t eaten all day.
    “Are these sandwiches samples? Or do I have to pay for them?” I said to the man running the booth.
    The man, who was on his phone, gave a brisk head nod, signaling to me that they were in fact free samples.
    Thinking that this was a signal to take one, I grabbed one of the sandwiches and felt the crispness of the bread alongside the aroma and taste of the chicken placed delicately inside of the two slices.
    It was amazing to say the least.
    I mean, I’ve never had a sandwich that tasted better in my life.
    And I’m somewhat of a sandwich connoisseur if I do so say myself.
    I’ve tasted all kinds of sandwiches, from your everyday Subway 6-inch all the way to The Oriole “Ham Sandoval”, a sandwich by Noah Sandoval from Chicago.
    But even though this sandwich was pretty basic compared to the latter it was as if the man put his heart and soul into the creation of them.
    When I finished I began to walk off and was halted by the obscene sounds coming from the mouth of the “sample man”.
    “Hey you have to pay for those!” he said.
    I was taken aback by these words because I could’ve just sworn that he told me that the food was free.
    “I was nodding to the “You have to pay for this” question. There’s a lot going on bruh. I’m trying to multitask here.”
    I could do nothing but stare at him in surprise.
    “What do you mean I have to pay for this? I asked you if the sandwich was free and you nodded.”
    “No, you asked me 2 questions. I nodded to the second one,” he said.
    “What if I don’t have the money to pay for the sandwich?”, I asked in a gruff tone. I was getting irritated by the fact that I felt like I was being played here.
    In reply he asked, “So you came to the store with no money?”
    I had a hard time thinking of a reply to this one because it wouldn’t have made very much sense for me to come to the store with no money. I mean, who does that?
    Instead of thinking of something smart to say back I simply asked, “How much for the sandwich?”
    “2 dollars,” he replied.
    He beat me. There was nothing else I could do outside of complain to his supervisor. I couldn’t do that though because I knew how that would make me look, like a bum who didn’t have 2 bucks.
    I reached into my pocket and pulled out a crisp 2 dollar bill and handed it to the man, giving him a sharp look while also briskly pulling my hand back and carried on with the rest of my shopping.
    This was the last time I would ever take a sample from a store ever again.

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