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Thinks That Through

October 24, 1998

I wonder how many times I’ve gone through this.
I always want something and I never get it.
Each time it happens, I just remind myself
that I have to kill a little part of me
and just go on without what I want

There are some things we don’t have
control over

How other people act is one
of the things we don’t have control over
Does that mean I deserve different
treatment
Well, I think I deserve it
Apparently no one else thinks that through

I’ve been wanting all of the pieces

to fall into place for me
At this rate,
I’m going to have to try to put all the
pieces in place for myself
At this rate,
I’m not going to get what I want, I’m
going to always be ten years late in

having needs and wants and I’m going to
ever get them, because for my usual
problems, well, people got over that ten
tears ago

What did I want,
A happy ending?

That hasn’t happened yet

I wonder if other
people think like this
I wonder if I’m
the only one who thinks like this
Will I
be the only one hurting from those same things


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