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bizarre sexual stories in the news

from the los angeles times: two gay men, during sexual activity, decide to push a live hamster into the anal cavity of one of the men. however, after they realized they couldn’t get the hamster out, they tried to figure out what to do. the man without the hamster inside him decided to light a match to see if he could see where the hamster was. so man-without-hamster is perched underneath man-with- hamster, and lights a match right under man-with-hamster’s anus. at that time man-with-hamster passes wind, and it causes a small streak of fire to jump out and singe the man-without-hamster’s eye-brows and facial hair. however, because there was gas in the anal cavity, the fireball then shot into the man-with-hamster, circled around the hamster, burning the inside of the man-with-hamster. Furthermore, the gas change and pressure shot the hamster out of the man-with-hamster’s anus and into the man-without-hamster’s face, breaking his nose.


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Chicago Poet Janet Kuypers
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Revealing all your Dirty Little Secrets, 2007 Down in the Dirt collection book, front cover