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The Return of Charo

Luivette Resto

In November 2001,
Time magazine announced
the return of Charo.

She rediscovered her
cha-chas, coleta, and coochie-coochies.
Her skimpy, sequined dresses,
bright orange like my great-Aunt Tata’s living room in 1973,
were taken out of retirement.

Charo had all a Latin entertainer needed:
big dyed hair, long legs, and pouty lips.
We had seen all of this before
when Iris Chacón scandalized our TV sets
with the first televised thong.

Iris’ childbearing hips and large mole
above her lip,
hypnotized Telemundo audiences.

She danced for two minutes
between skits for a variety show
with a feather tail and six male dancers in spandex.

Every little girl watched in amazement
as they purposefully rode their underwear
up their brown asses.

Today those little girls are mothers
with little girls listening to their own
sazón flavored music.
Admiring a new set of recycled Latinas
crossing over the musical border
with billion dollar asses,
covering dark roots with their new blond hair.

They all flaunted their sex and race,
defiantly mixing the two like
Bacardi and cocaine.
As we OD,
wishing Charo and her cha-chas good luck.

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