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Chapter 38 (v1)
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People's Lives Were at Stake

I know everyone was talking about it and after the fact
you'd hear the reports on the news about the damage done

and you'd think that we were in a war zone and that all of this
was done for religious purposes and people's lives were at stake

and maybe they were and I just don't know it. I don't know. I
know what it's like to have a cause but I never tried to

close people out to it, I tried to include them, to open them
up to it, but I remember deciding once to walk to a woman's parade

called take back the night, so that people knew that women
should feel safe walking alone in the streets at night without

worrying about being mugged or raped or killed because they were
female. Well anyway, I was walking to the parade to take

photographs because I'm a photographer, and a group of women
were walking in a group to the parade, so I walked down the street

and started walking with them, and they were chanting and singing
and I thought, wow, this is unity, people together for a cause.

and one of the women told me while we were walking that someone
women there didn't like me walking with them because I was white

and they were African American. and I looked around and noticed
that there wasn't a racial mix, and I said, well, we're all going to the same

place, and the woman replied, well, some people don't like you
walking with us anyway. so I turned my head and let them walk

and I crossed the street and took another block and got there before them.
and this is how we define how we should be separated, I suppose,

though I still don't understand it. and during that parade I heard
about a trial case where a black man was convicted of a police brutality

crime, and the black community was outraged, saying that
the white man was holding them down, and maybe in a way they are right

and I just don't understand it. a large group of people started their own
rally that night which seemed to take center stage from women's rights,

i mean, they're just women, what are they going to do, bitch a little louder,
or complain a little more, but then again, maybe it is just a matter

of deciding who has the loudest voice, or who has the most recent problem
to complain about, I don't know. we went out that night, and I heard

the next day that in light of the trial 23 fires were started
on school property, and most of them were of books in libraries

and I thought, this isn't nonresistant violence, this is out and out violent
and what they're destroying are opportunities for learning and not ideas.

yeah, but do these books hold what the white man wants you to learn?
if this how he alters our perceptions? i don't know, but this doesn't

solve anything and this isn't the answer... then I heard about one of my
best friends, a white man, hit once by a black man in the street

while they were out that night, and the doctor said that they had to have
a roll of quarters in their hand or brass knuckles because this was a clean break

of their jaw and for six weeks his jaw was wired shut and he had to throw pizza
or meat loaf in the blender so he could eat something instead of ice cream

while he tried to recover. and I thought, is this all getting anything done?
are we coming any closer to racial harmony? what are we learning from this?

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