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Palaver

Bijit Sinha

    The leather-clad soldier looks down upon his brother-in-arms with a blank gaze, as he pushes him down the ditch. As the other man’s senses slowly fade out, it becomes obvious to him that his fate is sealed. But there is no pleading for mercy in this situation, for his still eyes gaze upon the armored man out of curiosity. For he was one whom the folk had counted upon; their golden prodigy! But before the man’s failed life miserably comes to a close, he comes to a horrifying conclusion as the other returns his gaze- this destruction wrought upon them was not the doing of a madman; rather something done out of base understanding. That in fact, there was no saving them.
    As the soldier had dug up the hole, flashes of searing silent screams had borne upon his head. Here he stood, aware of the futility of his attempt to stop the genocide, and yet he had to be the one to have initiated the massacre. For there could not have been any sort of absolution for the deed he had taken upon himself. He was helpless in the muddy terrain, crying out a stifled roar of agony in place of the victim, but there was nothing to be said underneath the sterner skies. In the end, he himself begins to reminisce back to the transpired events that had dramatically shifted his fate.
    Soldier: Can I do it?
    Perpetrator: If your heart lies on it.
    Soldier: Will I succeed?
    Perpetrator: The rest is up to you.
    Soldier: I am not going to come out of this with a clean slate, am I?
    Perpetrator: Duty upholds above everything.
    Soldier: Just promise me one thing?
    Perpetrator: Very well.
    Soldier: Can you guarantee salvation for my soul?
    Perpetrator: Nothing is definite.
    Soldier: Can you?
    Perpetrator: ...
    Soldier: Will my conscience be intact after this?

    Perpetrator: You realize the consequences if you fail this, don’t you?
    Soldier: I understand.
    Perpetrator: You cannot....you must not fail in your crusade?
    Soldier: This is not so simple.
    Perpetrator: You must have realized what is at stake around here?
    Soldier: I try to...but I cannot help but relive the insecurities of my life.
    Perpetrator: What do you mean?
    Soldier: Even if I am honored to do the greater good, I remain fixated on my own interests.
    Perpetrator: We shall see about that, won’t we?
    Soldier: I hope I won’t pay the due for the bloodshed.
    Perpetrator: ...............................................................

    Soldier: Are you willing to stoop so low for your so-called noble goal?
    Perpetrator: Justice is fickle. The laws that people rely upon are illusionary.
    Soldier: You can’t make decisions for everyone. Isn’t that unfair?
    Perpetrator: When people can’t stand for themselves, it’s time for one to lead them into greatness.
    Soldier: And yet you are willing to sacrifice the people for a select few?
    Perpetrator: Transcendence is everything humans have ever wished for....there can be no real acknowledgement of destiny.
    Soldier: ..................................................................

    Perpetrator: You could have never done this, can you?
    Soldier: It seems I overestimated myself.
    Perpetrator: And yet, you hope for the fulfillment of the deal on our end?
    Soldier: Hope is merely an instrument to foster activity in humans...or else we would all have been dead beings of the living.
    Perpetrator: Have you lost hope on the future?
    Soldier: ..........................................
    Perpetrator: Have you lost hope on us?
    Soldier: .........................................
    Perpetrator: Have you lost hope on humanity?
    Soldier: .........................................
    Perpetrator: Is there nothing that can be done to save our inherent existence?

    For the moment, I am clueless. The lull of despair that has inhabited my thoughts has hollowed out my soul. For the time has come when my actions bear no causality upon the dire consequences...you may have your way paved after all.

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