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Homeroom

Allan Onik

    Tab took his worksheet out of his backpack and placed it on his desk. He sharpened his pencil and attempted to start when his homeroom teacher interrupted him. She stood at the blackboard with a beehive hairdo and a knit green sweater.
    “Would you like some help with your homework?” She asked.
    “Of course,” Tab said.
    “Math huh? Let’s start with some exercises. What’s two times three?”
    “Six,” Tab said.
    “No—that’s five silly.” The teacher began to write it on the chalkboard.
    “Huh?”
    “What’s five plus two? Exercise those frontal lobes dear.”
    “Seven?”
    “Ten.”
    “What?”
    “Final question. What is the end decimal of Pi?”
    “3.14...”
    “Trick question dear, you’re in the wrong dimension.” The demon’s makeup began to melt off its’ face revealing red skin, yellow teeth and eyes, and a horned forehead. The playground and courtyard outside the classroom window burst with beetles and tall flames. “Did you bring your running shoes? Next period is gym class.”

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